Tutti Ta Hula



Rhiannon's got a brand new dance. She learned it in school where, as the astute reader may have discerned, they do not teach fractions. Instead they teach this: "Tutti Ta".

The lyrics to this song are:

Ah tutti ta ah tutti ta ah tutti ta taaaaah
Ah tutti ta ah tutti ta ah tutti ta taaaaah
Thumbs out!

[repeat chorus]

Now, after each chorus, something else gets added to the mix. The last verse is as follows:

Thumbs out!
Elbows back!
Feet apart!
Knees together!
Bottoms up!
Tongue out!
Eyes closed!
Turn around!

It's like the chant is part of a Dionysiac mystery cult, something straight out of A Secret History, but in this class nobody dies, goes nuts, and it's well, actually kind of fun. Donna Tartt could have learned something from this song and would have maybe switched to something not involving writing of any kind. Listen to the song too much and one develops cavities in the brain.

Anyway, Rhiannon performed this song and dance this evening. Wearing pink flip-flops, skort, pink shirt screenprinted with "Pinkie's Surf Shop", a grass skirt and a bikini top composed of nylon cord and two, white plastic shells. I kid you not. "Tutti Ta" Hawaiian style. Somehow she'll turn this into rocket science or brain surgery or both (which would be really odd if you think about it for too long).

But watching her there, hamming it up, singing the song, shaking her bon-bon, the rustle of the grass skirt keeping time, I could see her there, almost, at the Kennedy Center Honors to perform that old childhood chestnut, "Tutti Ta", for the president of the United States.

Rhiannon. Tutti Cutey.