Weird Science


Rhiannon and I performed our first experiment today. It was all Rhiannon's idea. At first. We were painting this morning, and she wanted to see what color would be dominant if she mixed everything together into a plastic cup. So we tried it and came up with a vaguely gray-purple liquid.

"DAD?"

"Yes, Rhiannon?"

"Can we do something else?"

"Sure!" I was hoping she'd as that question.

"Let's put it in the microwave!"

"Okay."

I like the way this kid thinks. I put the cup of water-paint into the microwave oven and ask Rhiannon for how long we should nuke the solution.

"Um...one second, or else it will explode!"

Rhiannon knows somehow that heat can be a catalyst for chemical reactions. Genius.

So we nuke it for one second exactly. Rhiannon refuses to get near the stuff and is afraid to touch the cup which is in fact quite cool.

"Let's put something else in!"

"Okay, Rhiannon. Good idea. But you know what we should do first?"

"WHAT?"

"We should get paper and pen so we can make a note of what we are doing. If the experiment works, we'll know how to reproduce it, and if it fails, we can see where we went wrong."

"OKAY!"

So we begin to go through the refridgerator and cupboards adding the following things in this order to make a solution that Rhiannon is quite sure will explode. Because that's what chemistry is about. Blowing $#*( up. Oh, and because of this, she needs eye protection and grabs a pair of Jackie O sunglasses to wear with her Hello Kitty feet pajamas as we add:

coffee bean (1)
jalapeno pepper sauce
Not Osama red pepper sauce (Rhiannon calls this "President Sauce")
pickle juice
milk
kalamata olive juice
caper (1)
chocolate syrup (Rhiannon tests this on herself first)
grated parmesan/romano cheese
garlic juice
soy sauce (Rhiannon chose this over Worcestershire sauce)
sprinkles
red wine vinegar (I showed Rhiannon how chemists waft odors)
baking powder

Now, as every kid and parent knows who has made their own volcano project, these last two ingredients combine to make big foam, and fast. Rhiannon did not expect the reaction and jumped off the counter and ran out the front door with her hands over her ears.

Once I stopped laughing, I went outside.

"Rhiannon, it's okay. It didn't blow up."

"But it MIGHT!"

"No, it's okay."

"Well..."

"Maybe I should drink it to see if I become a werewolf."

"NO DADDY DON'T DO IT!"

"Okay. I will pour it down the sink." This is what every chemist knows....

A minute later Rhiannon comes back inside. Everything is gone, cleaned up.

"Well Rhiannon, that was fun."

"Except the last part. That was scary."

"What should we call the experiment?"

"Root beer float."

Rhiannon. Experimentally cute.

Andrew (Papa)